WHILE I’M AWAY
While I’m away,
Though I’m not your pappy,
I pray you’ll stay
Healthy and happy! 😊
Tag: health
DAD BODS!
DAD BODS!
They say, “dad bods” are popular,
So, I am where it’s at!
Just a little out of shape,
Just a teeny bit fat,
So, put me on a runway,
And watch me strut my stuff,
Then, I bet you’ll shout,
“Please stop, that’s enough!”
LOVE IS A HEALTH HAZARD!
LOVE IS A HEALTH HAZARD!
Yes, falling in love
Can bring great pleasure,
But also, it wreaks havoc
On your health and blood pressure,
You’re stressed when you want
A late-night snack, but
Your selfish lover ate
The very last doughnut,
You’re also stressed when fishing
And your health is really shook,
When your lover shouts, “Man up,
And bait your own dang hook!”
And your ear drums are pierced,
It’s verifiably factual,
At your lover’s high-pitched laugh,
Like a sick Pterodactyl,
Yes, love causes great pain,
Don’t ignore it or guffaw,
We haven’t even gotten to
Sick mothers-in-law! 😊
PICKLED BEETS OR PICKLED PIG FEET?
PICKLED BEETS OR PICKLED PIG FEET?
Pick one: which would be worse to eat,
Do you say pickled beets or pickled pig feet?
At least the beets are veggies,
But pickled beets seem nasty,
But at least you won’t need
A pork-induced angioplasty,
But pigs produce bacon,
Pork chops, and ham,
But pig feet seem more
Like vile chittlins’ and spam,
Okay, one more point and we can stop,
Beets never lay in gross pig slop! 😊
BURGERS AND HEART ATTACKS!
BURGERS AND HEART ATTACKS!
Give me french fries and burgers
Til I am sated,
Cuz good nutrition
Is over-rated!
Then, chocolate pie
And cheesecake — what’s the harm?
Wait, what’s this pain
Radiating down my left arm?! 😊
SOUTHERN WRITER 