TUMMY GLITTER!

candy bar14

TUMMY GLITTER!

Dietitians may view chocolate

As sugary litter,

But I view chocolate

As “tummy glitter!”

 

Every single kid,

Near and far,

Lights up when they open

A chocolate candy bar!

 

I love chocolate,

Of every shape and ilk,

White chocolate, dark chocolate,

And especially milk,

 

So, maybe dietitians

Wouldn’t be so bitter,

If they’d get out and grab

Some “tummy glitter!”   😊

FOOD CRAVINGS!

pig (1)

FOOD CRAVINGS!

I craved something

New and delicious to eat,

Then, you suggested chicken lips

And pickled pigs’ feet,

But no, I’m not adventurous,

I don’t want to dine out

On puny pony eyes

Or fried possum snout,

Sir, I hate to be

A contrarian,

But you’ve converted me

To be vegetarian!   😊

CHOCOLATE CANDY HELL!

chocolate hearts

CHOCOLATE CANDY HELL!

Candy whispered in my ear,

“Just take a little bite!”

“And there’s cake over here,”

“We’ll be your love tonight!”

 

So, I took a bite,

And engorged on thousands more,

And then, another thousand,

Just to even up the score!

 

Then, candy consumed me,

Before the final bell,

That is how I ended up

In chocolate candy hell!   😊

THE CHOCOLATE STUDIES!

chocolate brownies

THE CHOCOLATE STUDIES!

I dislike doctors and dietitians,

Who want to throw all my chocolate out,

They are just p.c. politicians,

Who make me eat vile brussel sprouts,

 

So, I conducted my own diet studies,

With “unbiased” chocolate-loving buddies,

The studies aren’t official and you may mock it,

But at least now there’s support for eating…

CHOCOLATE!   😊

PEG LEG PETE’S PRUNES!

pirate

PEG LEG PETE’S PRUNES!

My name is Peg Leg Pete,

While on a voyage from Crete,

I felt a pain so foul,

Emanate from my bowel,

 

So, I looked down at my plate,

I must investigate,

Could it be the rancid goat

Which caused my wretched bloat?

 

Or maybe the moldy cheese,

Brought me to my knees?

No, it’s the fact that for many moons,

I’ve eaten daily 80 prunes!   😊