GRANNY’S FIRST RULE

woman old

GRANNY’S FIRST RULE

You’d better listen to Granny,

Her first rule was clear,

And she’d blister your fanny,

If you didn’t listen or hear:

 

Even if you get shot,

And pain drives you insane,

You dang well better not

Take the Lord’s name in vain,

 

Granny was sweet

To all gentlemen and ladies,

Until you broke her first rule,

Then, she’d condemn you

To Hades!   😊

TUMMY GLITTER!

candy bar14

TUMMY GLITTER!

Dietitians may view chocolate

As sugary litter,

But I view chocolate

As “tummy glitter!”

 

Every single kid,

Near and far,

Lights up when they open

A chocolate candy bar!

 

I love chocolate,

Of every shape and ilk,

White chocolate, dark chocolate,

And especially milk,

 

So, maybe dietitians

Wouldn’t be so bitter,

If they’d get out and grab

Some “tummy glitter!”   😊

A THOROUGH BAPTISM!

underwater

A THOROUGH BAPTISM!

Preacher, don’t just dunk him,

When he’s baptized,

Make sure you’ve sunk him,

Til he’s exorcised,

 

He’s gone through all the rings

Of Dante’s Inferno,

He’s done such evil things,

So, please infer…So,

 

Read aloud Leviticus,

Then, read it again,

Then, raise him up,

And see if he still sins!   😊